My prayer life has been changing the last few weeks. I’m more ready to just pray, instead of thinking about praying, saying I’ll pray, or wishing I would pray more often. I’m a guilty Christian, who says she’ll pray, but most of the time doesn’t. I think. I think to God…but that’s not really the same…I don’t think. (See there I go…thinking.)
But I’ve been making an effort to pray out loud, no matter who is in front of me, beside me, or behind me.
Under this reason, is that I want to have a prayerful life, I want the first thing I do in ANY situation, is stop and pray, giving thanks and praise, or entreating, God. And secondary to that, I want my children to see a mother who put’s God first in any situation, and seeks Him with honesty. They learn best by watching and hearing.
So when I make a mistake, and act bitterly and angrily towards my husband, in front of them…I make sure that I pray, apologize and pray with my Mr. in front of them too.
When I’m anxious about something, and it’s making me short with everyone, or distracted…I make sure to pray about it, and then explain myself, to my children and family.
Belief and faith are things that can be faked in public, but only in the true living of life in the home, do we see what we’re really made of. And I’ve seen lately, that I’m not made of things that are sugar and spice, and everything nice…nor godly. God’s been showing me that this needs to change, and I happen to agree with him. Who wants to live with a cranky, nagging, sharp tongued, bitter, and angry person? I don’t even want to live with me…
The benefits of prayer are endless, so I won’t try to list them here, but I will say that just the effort of praying can seem like a lot. I’ve seen though, that just expressing myself to my Creator, my King, does wonders for the fears, anxiety, anger and worry. It’s becoming a lifeline for me, and I’m thankful that He doesn’t leave me here in this mess for long. Just long enough to learn what I need too. (which, let’s face it…Sometimes IS a long time, sigh)